@D503 admit cards out. Lagta nahi ab upsc will postpone it.
Where? I can't find on UPSC website
what are you guys doing these days? i might sound childish but this whole corona induced uncertainty is driving me insane. was happily preparing for intv. now with dates postponed, dont know how to move ahead. losing all interest in this exam. wish i had a real job and contributed to my family's finances in these crunch times.
last year was horrified to hear stories of suffering. but was certain that with precaution things would pan out fine for me. and they did to an extent. cleared pre and mains. but this 2nd wave is a step into reality. a rude shock. am in delhi. in my very own flat of 8 families, 3 have tested positive this time. family members of friends have passed away. situation is grim. the thought that it could be our turn any moment haunts me every day. aging parents and a dependent son in a corona world. title of a horror movie. cant imagine going through this suffering.
in cities we are accustomed to the idea that value of human life is very insignificant. especially if you are from a working class family. but the pandemic has pushed this notion to different level. bodies being transported like trash. families begging to see the dead, one last time. overcrowded hospitals. its nothing short of an apocalypse. forgive me for painting a cynical and pessimistic picture. but truth must be understood to prepare ourselves for what may be inevitable for some unlucky souls in the coming days.
prep wise, study hours are approaching zero. anxiety at peak. insomnia. trying to reconcile mind to this new reality, a living nightmare, with my aspiration and dream of civil service. havent stepped out in months. still trying to stay positive. lets keep our thoughts and prayers with those families that are losing their bread earners and loved ones. the pain is unimaginable. lets support warriors, civil society, media and all govt functionaries irrespective of ideology in this collective fight for survival. the constant bickering and blame game by parties and media is salt on the wound. we must rise above all this. may god help us all.
You have just described my condition. I could not clear CSE mains 2020 and I know that I have to gear up for CSE 2021, for all stages. But just cannot. this uncertainty has amplified my anxiety disorder and even therapy is not working well for me.
