This platform is unique, after every result we hear some heartbreaking stories, some inspiring ones.
In 2019 attempt, can say that was my first serious attempt, I was expecting interview call. Everybody who has written Mains expects that, so was the case with me. But the Pdf didn't have my roll number. Waited for 10 months to find out how close I was. 17 Oct the marks were disclosed (after frustrating wait). Missed the call by 2 marks. I know even if 2 marks somehow awarded, I couldn't have made to the final list. But appearing in interview could have been a phenomenon for me, for my family. But I accepted the fate and thought - Okay this time I will make it. I was confident enough to clear Prelims 2020. Pumped up for this mains I was putting more efforts. 6 days later Prelims PDF was there and boom my name wasn't there. After scoring 122 in 2019 prelims, I failed this one.
Now my situation is my marks for 2019 attempt at both stages don't inspire me. I am afraid of prelims itself.
So why this write up, just to let you know things can go in any direction in this exam. Give your efforts, don't confine your self to your room, go play the sports you love, meet the people you like to meet, dance whenever there is a chance. Just don't let this exam dictate your life. If you have to make it you will, even if you don't give your best. There can be cases that you will never make it to the final list.
After failure in this prelims, instead of thinking negative, I thought about the other options. Got to know about many things- like public policy sector, some startup ideas popped up, gave other exams as well (no positives yet).
We can find out something, we will find out something.
And at last- don't let your guard down if you are giving 2021 attempt. Not much time left for prelims and forget about mains (just 80 days). In this year itself, probably by December, you can have your roll number in the pdf for Interview stage.