May 5, 2024   Academy | Blog  | Community  | Our Philosophy
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Mains Exam, Self Esteem and Mental Health

Though I have never given mains butI totally understand you. 

But with me the problem is in prelims too. In 2020 pre (in exam hall) , I said to myself  "Idiot, you did not even study this? You did not even know this question? huh? Look at others, how difficult it must have been for them to study- some affected by covid, some in jobs and some managing household work, etc"

Later, I realized I made silly mistake like-Solving question 41 but marking Q40 OMR instead of 41, the more nervous I got , the more silly mistakes I did( by the way, I did make these mistakes in mocks before and minimised it but in pre again did) and more I forgot what I studied. And while marking 50:50 question--my brains works like "if I mark option b "what is 'a' option is correct and not 'b'" and vice versa"

I know I lacked preparation in 1st attempt but in second attempt, I was more disappointed (with myself).

I too think anxiety and exam fear overpowers my brain.

But doing hobbies tends to reduce a little anxiety.

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@balwintejas Glad someone else feel like this too.

But, why should our self-esteem depend on exam though. I feel like self esteem should be like- if I am performing well, my self esteem should say "good, you performed well but don't get it to your head and work hard" and if performing bad then inner voice should say "ok , analyze your mistakes, keep it in mind and move on, you can do it , don't stress out too much".

But what actually happens is that the inner voice in my head criticizes every action " you performed well , huh, mock must be too easy" and if perform bad, then- "idiot, you are hopeless".

Somebody suggested me to do hobbies. Mine is drawing, painting, so when I draw a little, that self criticizing voice diminishes and I feel better and less anxious. In last few days , I could not do hobby, so that voice got a lot bigger. Now, again trying to control that.

@balwintejas I feel it is about balance-knowledge and confidence. Nothing more and nothing less of both.
All the best to you.

@Neyawn - I don't know why, I think you can almost read people's mind. If possible, please tell what do you think of what we wrote in above comments.
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Thanks for suggesting the book. I read the sample pages and can mostly relate to what it talks about low self-esteem. Especially, about self destructiveness we "know" we are inadequate/can't do anything and that "happiness anxiety". Sometimes, understanding the feelings we go through gives more clarity on how we behave. Please share anything else too if you found it to be helpful. 


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@sbhati513590 Exactly, you are right, knowing our feelings, emotions, thoughts and realizing we are not the only one to go through it helps to bring a lot of clarity in mind.  (That's why I listen to K-pop songs a lot, they have a song for almost every emotion).

Will surely let you know if I pick up the book(may be in the next few days). It seemed very interesting and I could not stop reading it. Thanks.
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sbhati513590said

@Brave For me it is Radiohead. That should not come as a surprise if you have listened to “Creep”. 😅


Wait, I just remembered thissong. I did not know it was a cover though.

By the way, I did pick up the book.(Studying endlessly and then sitting in exam with low self esteem/confidence will do me no good). I was so surprised to find that it also talks about loving yourself.(Similar to thissong).

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Creep cover by exo - 

'Answer : Love Myself' (Color Coded Lyrics) by BTS- 



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