Mathematics Optional, Two Mains, Flunked Prelims, What's the plan next?

Hey everyone, 

I am from mathematics optional. (Marks mentioned below)

However, I flunked in 2019 prelims. So,  a fear set in. It led me to appear for CGL, SBI PO , IBPS PO etc during August - September 2019 (when really I should have been preparing for mains / optional). I realise this now because I feel resistance to go into UPSC with full flow again. I don't know why. 

May be I need a 'stick' from someone or something very simple. But , at this point, I feel confused. 

Also, my GS Score for 2017 and 2018 has been shared for succinct advise on how to jump start UPSC GS prep. 

I do lack my peer GS group at present.

GS                 2017     2018

GS1 :             72            77                

GS2 :            73            89

GS3 :            106          90

GS4 :            61            93

MathsP1 :     134           125

MathsP2 :    137            113