Subscribe to ForumIAS

Depression/Sadness

Undergoing with huge depression and sadness. Unable to be enthusiastic and cheerful. Just want to cry and scared of people.

Kindly help. 

sonder,Just_relentlessand15 otherslike this
23k views

45 comments

Kindly give priority to this. Thank you


Best- everyday. Nonstop. 
BD,nerdfighterand1 otherslike this
8.8k views

Hey@Aarushi123. I’m sorry you’re going through such a tough time. I hope better days come soon for you. I’m sure some day these clouds will clear up and you can be as enthusiastic and cheerful as you want. If you feel like it, please share more. We can talk on DM too. Sending you love and all my good wishes.

Aurora,EiChanand11 otherslike this
9k views
.
Aurora,chamomileand14 otherslike this
9k views

It takes huge effort to come out and admit that one is undergoing depression. So, Kudos to you for doing that.

If it is existing for a longer duration, it will be better to see a professional therapist. 

I can understand that in present mode, it is very difficult to find purpose in anything, be it talking to friends, studying or any leisure activities. However, there are people who are willing to listen to our thoughts. Please talk to those people in your life. Taking a break from current routine can also help.

Just to assure you, many of us Forum peeps are there for you. You can feel free to discuss anything here.

This too shall pass, my friend. Sending you lots of good wishes. :)

EiChan,AJ_and6 otherslike this
8.6k views

I’m in no way qualified to give you any advice but as a fellow human being who went through a rough patch two years ago I can share what helped me. When we feel this way, it’s easy to let ourselves slip deeper into it. It’s the path of least resistance, right? But trust me it’s also the path to guaranteed self-destruction. It’s difficult to fight your way out of this deep dark hole, but there are ways and things worth fighting for outside that hole of depression.

It really helped me to go into problem solving mode and thats basically the crux of the solution. How you choose to solve it up to you. As@nerdfighter mentioned, hobbies or anything that interests you is a great way to overcome your present rough patch. Its also a great time to learn something new, a new language, a skill or even a hobby. When you are learning something new there’s always something to challenge your mind and give you a sense of purpose. 

Surround yourself with people who love and care for you genuinely. Even if its difficult to believe otherwise, we always have people who truly care for us. They can be anyone you are comfortable with, friends, family, forum peeps.

I would also advise you to seek professional help from a therapist, who can help you to truly understand why you feel the way you feel. If you are uncomfortable to do so, I would suggest journaling or writing down your feelings, every time you hit a rough patch. Really ask yourself the tough questions. It’s a lot easier sometimes to write things to yourself than having to open up to a therapist because there are really no judgments and you can discover things about yourself at your own pace. If you wish, I could put you in touch some mental health professionals who deal with coping, depression and anxiety as well.

I also read a beautiful poem by Khalil Gibran this morning. I don’t know if you’d find it relevant to you but maybe you find this line useful

I would that my life remains a tear and a smile.

A tear to purify my heart and give me understanding 

Of life’s secrets and hidden things.

chamomile,TambourineManand8 otherslike this
8.6k views

:pray::pray:I am extremely thankful to whatonly, nerfighter, farzicoder, DeekshitaP . Thank you so much

People like you have enhanced by belief in mankind.  

I am reading all these responses/messages multiple times. 

Will write when i will be okay.




Best- everyday. Nonstop. 
Aurora,TambourineManand6 otherslike this
9.8k views
.
BD,whatonly
7.4k views

:pray::pray:I am extremely thankful to whatonly, nerfighter, farzicoder, DeekshitaP . Thank you so much

People like you have enhanced by belief in mankind.  

I am reading all these responses/messages multiple times. 

Will write when i will be okay.



Hey no worries at all. Take your time to heal and reflect. We’re all here only :)

BD,nerdfighterand1 otherslike this
7.2k views

:pray::pray:I am extremely thankful to whatonly, nerfighter, farzicoder, DeekshitaP . Thank you so much

People like you have enhanced by belief in mankind.  

I am reading all these responses/messages multiple times. 

Will write when i will be okay.



Take care friend, rooting for you ❤

BD,nerdfighter
7.4k views
@Aarushi123  Hello. 
It's good that you thought of reaching out, so courageous of you. 
Though I am no expert on mental health, from personal experience - 
1. The thoughts make you spiral down in a dark pit. Constant agonizing thoughts. One thought leads to another and it's a downhill from there. 
2. These thoughts would cause fear, anxiety, irritability, numbness, recklessness. 
3. In such situations we start staying inside our head. Outside world rendered meaningless. 
4. Try not to give in to the thoughts. Observe them like floating clouds. 
5. Do something that makes you get out of your head. Exercise is best. Dance, yoga, Aerobics anything. 
6. Try controlling your thoughts at least for couple of minutes each day. And you may find power over them. 
7. If studies are stressing you out... Its completely ok to keep your books aside for few days and do things you enjoy. 

Few guided meditations and music for you - 
Check this out on Insight Timerhttps://insig.ht/ZvpPPl37Dgb
https://insig.ht/SKxaOpl8Dgb

Wishing you bliss. 
Do reach out anytime. 
Take care. 


TambourineMan,AJ_and5 otherslike this
8.5k views
Thank You Drishti. 

Best- everyday. Nonstop. 
8.4k views

I'm in no way an expert, but just the fact that you've accepted you need help tells me you're on your way to being better. When I'm feeling down, I do things which make me happy. And it works. You could talk to a professional or someone who understands you or even the lovely peeps here at Forum.


Try to break the monotony of your daily routine. Take a walk, water some plants, listen to your favorite music or watch your comfort show. Stay away from those people/things which bring negativity. Even if it might not seem like it, there is always someone who cares about us. 


Don't be harsh on yourself. Give yourself time because time is the greatest healer. And please don't hesitate to post your thoughts here. This is a safe space. I wish you all the strength in the world.You will beat this! 

Villanelle,AJ_and5 otherslike this
8.6k views

Hey, 

I'm myself on antidepressants so 1thing i can tell u for Sure- that u need medical help. U need to check on which stage of depression u are. Not all stages require medicine. If caught early therapy is enough. 

If u prolong this then u might need medicine otherwise just normal therapy.. 

See.. No matter how much everyone tries to counsel u.. U need someone who is an expert and non judgemental and unrelated by blood or friendship as they'll give an unbiased opinion on things. 

I'm sorry if I might sound rude. But this is reality better recognize it early... 

I hope u get well soon... 

EiChan,chamomileand7 otherslike this
8.8k views

Hey, I can understand how you feel. I would urge you to seek professional help . It's perfectly normal and healthy thing to do. It would certainly help you.


6.9k views
No expectations from life or anything = No depression.

Jai Shree Ram !


Rashmirathi,
6.9k views
@babu_bisleri But that's not a great way to go about life, is it? Everyone should have expectations, expectations of support from friends and family and of kind words from strangers here when one needs them and of better times in future. This is what binds us all in the social fabric, being nihilistic can't be a solution. I don't mean to offend you, I am just saying that its completely fine to have expectations. 

And to@Aarushi123 I just want to send virtual hugs and lots of love your way. I know these are tough times but you're very brave for acknowledging the issue, and for wanting to deal with it. We are all here for you. Everyone in the comments above has been very kind with suggestions, do look into them. Talk to people around you and seek professional help if that is needed. I have found mindfulness as a great help for my mental health and you can give it a try too. You can DM me, anytime. 

Just remember what Prof. Dumbledore said  - "Happiness can be found, even in the darkest of times, if one only remembers to turn on the light."

Take care :)


Villanelle,AJ_and5 otherslike this
8.1k views
No expectations from life or anything = No depression.

Maybe too nihilistic? :O

6.7k views

Hey there,

It's a tough task to dispel the darkness that has currently set in. You might be receiving many suggestions from your friends, well wishers, co-aspirants, etc. All of them would be nice to read and would be to your liking and infact most of them might be even the right set of advices. But fast forward next 10 days, your situation will more or less likely to be same as now. The reason being you are in all probability not going to follow those advices in practice. Even though unwillingly, you would be continuing with the same mindset as you are currently in. And this exactly leads me to my point no. 1.


1) Observe your daily routine/habits/proclivities over a period of a few days. All you have to do is that after every couple of hours you have to observe yourself like what thought process you were in and what actions you indulged in! You will notice that a whole set of negativities has engulfed you. In actual terms you were not doing anything! You were either regretting about something, pondering over some issues, or else you might be engaged in some petty tendencies that you would be giving effect to at a subconscious level like seeing your mobile notifications, checking WhatsApp, Instagram frequently etc etc. So, the first step is to work on your daily routine with a view to streamline it, wipe off all negativities crept therein, and finally make it more meaningful and positive.


2) Suppose with the same mindset as you are having right now, you are entrusted with the job of receiving cash from and paying cash to the customers. Yes, you are cashier in a leading Public Sector Bank where you have to do a strenuous sitting and mentally taxing job for around 7 hours. Now for those 7 hours you would be totally engrossed in your duty and your current situation will be out of your mind. So the point is that always try to remain busy in some productive activities. If not productive, talk to your family members or friends. But in no case, indulge in action-less thinking. Always remember that an empty mind is devil's house. Keep yourself away from social media and once in a while deactivate all yours accounts temporarily. 


3) At times, some of us are subject to some really tough phases in our life and as a result we get overwhelmed with the feelings of fear, anxiety, grief, dejection etc. It happens because of the bad deeds of our past lives which start taking a toll on the present life. However to lessen the ill effects of them, our sacred texts have mentioned 6 karmic pathways namely Mantra, Tantra, Yantra, Aushadha, Yagna and Ratna. You can resort to these for getting relief from the troubles you are presently experiencing.  And yes, they do work!


4) Always remember, you will have to make great efforts to come out of your current situation. Yes, you will succeed for sure but with exceedingly high discipline and indomitable willpower. Nothing in life comes from being in comfort zone. I know these things are easier said than done but after all it's you who is caught up in such a mess and it's you who is all desperate to overcome it. So, it's again YOU who will have to make some real and genuine efforts to unshackle the chains of your misery. 


5) If despite trying your best you are unable to help yourself, try seeking some professional consultancy by a psychiatrist or go for some counseling therapy. 

All the best. I wish you lead a happy, blissful life ahead. :)@Aarushi123 

EiChan,discoFighterand4 otherslike this
8.3k views
I cannot say I know how you feel but I myself was in comparable condition few days back.
background- in span of two months I failed in mains, then I was not able to clear RBI grade b by 1.5 marks and adding to all of this I invested my savings in crypto(biggest mistake)
I felt like whatever I am doing is not working for me, I was not able to sleep, I was not able to talk to people even to my parents.
Then I called one of my friends I told him everything. He said bhai tu 3 attempt de nahi kuch hoga to business karenge yaar, chinta mat kar.
It was a small thing but at that point I realised that yeah why I am making an exam overpower me, there are opportunities and they will always be there and then I decided that I will work harder than before but I will not let anything compromise my mental peace.
Last 10 days have been one of the most satisfactory for me. People will say do yoga, do meditation but till we don't realise who we are and what we want it will not work.
Talk to someone, express your feelings, realise what you want. If you feel like you need therapist go for it but do not let anything ruin your mental health.
One more thing aarushi if you have expressed this feeling, you have moved one step closer to getting out of it. I wish you all the best , if I can be of any help to you or to anyone reading this I will be glad to help.


EiChan,Lighthouseand10 otherslike this
8.7k views

friends, it means a lot. That  you people have taken time to write such loving posts. 

Kindly tell on realistic basis, complete concentration like studying and no internet breaks/youtube/ eating food - kitni der ka hona chahiye for this exam? 15 mins, 30 mins, 1 hours, 5 hours , 10 hours? Kitna?


Best- everyday. Nonstop. 
whatonly,
7.5k views
Write your comment…