Civil Services Mains 2020 Results: In or Out ? Way ahead, gratitude and Pain

2nd attempt 1st mains.. Out.. Maths optional. 

Trying to Pick myself up from this failure.. only 3 months left in next pre ..

Out. PubAd :/ 

3rd attempt. First two attempts were with job and couldn't make it through prelims itself. So, quit job in Oct, 2019 & been on it full time ever since. 

Mistakes - Not completing Ethics & Optional comprehensively before Prelims itself; 

Areas I feel the need to improve most in exam - completing ethics paper within time; Addressing Optional paper 1 in a crisp manner; 

Since Jan, I was deeply concerned whether to return to job or not. But, as the next mains is barely 6 months away, I'm deciding to hold on for the next one and giving my best shot at it. 

Alongside, if I'm fortunate enough, I'll also try to make it into RBI Mains, EPFO & NABARD. But, at any cost, I'm aiming for a closure from this full-time studies within 6 months. 

Happens. Public Administration :(

3rd attempt 2nd mains..out with PSIR. Was difficult last time as well but this time I feel totally lost. Don’t know from where will I bring the strength 2 go on.

I want 2 move out of this preparation but  don’t know how. It is really tiring and has taken a toll on me.

In, PSIR. 2nd attempt. Last time gave interview but was not in the final list.

Really wondering how PSIR fared?

Because I see people commenting "PSIR ka result acha gaya hai" but I see several OUTs (here as well as on tg group). Also, I know people who gave interview last year with PSIR but this time could not clear. 

Out with PSIR. Third attempt and first Mains. Wasn.t very hopeful of a positive result, still it hits different when it actually happens. 

Will try to start again. Taking 2021 as the last attempt. Let.s see. 

Geography optional ... out (first mains, second attempt) ... Cried after a long time. I had bought a new pair of shoes and socks for my upcoming interview. I have made notes on most of the topics I mentioned in my DAF-I. I started forming opinions on issues so as to present them in the personality test. Everybody in my family was hoping that I'll clear this exam and I performed to the best of my abilities in the exam, still, I could not make it through. Only the mark sheet can tell, what went wrong. Definitely, I will analyze my mistakes few days and come back stronger. I am one of them who doesn't have backup plans. Today's result felt like a death to me. It's very hard to digest. 

I am taking this exam without any coaching and that is why I feel sometimes that I lack guidance. And my weak financial conditions also don't permit me to waste my parents' hard-earned money. I have very limited career options, I had a strategy of only focusing on this exam but now, I am going to change it and I will start appearing in other exams. Thank you guys for reading my thoughts as I thought this is the only good way to just speak out whatever is there on my mind.

4th attempt, 3rd mains. Out with PSIR optional. Not attempting this year. Studied full time for 4.5 years and here I have nothing in my hands. I feel like a gambler who squandered it all. Have to find a job. This job search in the private sector is going to be more excruciating than failing in this exam again. I am really frightened of attempting big things now. Not giving this exam this year. My mind is saturated and needs a break. Also I have to do a 10-15k salary job now. Had I took that placement in college I would have been at a far better state financially. Currently I am broke and Mum is the only person who earns in the family. I feel ashamed of myself