Out with a heavy heart . Gave it all in . Slogged too much . Was getting 130+ in mocks . Did almost everything right during preparation and did almost everything wrong in the exam . This is how it went :
Art and Culture/ Ancient and Medieval are achilles heel for me . Got first quarter in Set B full of them . Exhausted 40 mins .
In last 15 mins , i was left with around 30 questions. Panicked and made such stupid mistakes that i wont possibly commit in my wildest dreams .
Learnt a simple truth , very hard way . In this exam , “Mindset matters more than skillset“ . I lost my temperament, that day at that moment i lost my chance .
Was getting 86-90 from various keys . CSAT was 150+ from all keys .
But silver lining is that I have made peace with my failure . I started with Mains preparation just 2 days after Prelims . Because till I am trying , I am struggling. I have not lost it .Try , Fail and Fail better .
I have a lot to say and lot to write , but that is for some other day . For now all i have to do is focus on the process . People might not mean it seriously but if you look in hindsight, “Really , safar khoobsurat hai manzil se bhi”.
On this note , i would like to wrap my emotional pour with these lines of Faiz ,
दिल ना-उमीद तो नहीं नाकाम ही तो है,
लम्बी है ग़म की शाम मगर शाम ही तो है |
It is true that there might be some deficiencies in your preparation but plz also keep in mind the arbitrariness of this year's prelims paper. The role of luck was very high this time. Although someone will get selected in any case does not mean there must be deficiency in your preparation. It can be simply a case where luck was not in your favor.
