Essay Test – July 22, 2017

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Instructions: Write an essay on any one of the following in about 1000-1200 words. Time : 90 minutes Marks : 125


1. The science of today is the technology of tomorrow. 2.

  • Without economic development, any potential for political openness and freedom will be questionable.

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    Buddha Smiling
    Buddha Smiling
    8 years ago

    Badhia

    PRITISH KUMAR PANDA
    PRITISH KUMAR PANDA
    8 years ago

    comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image

    worldlywise
    worldlywise
    8 years ago

    Nice handwriting…
    Anyway we both took different view points regarding second essay..

    Golu
    Golu
    8 years ago

    Topic 1comment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment image

    chandlerbing
    chandlerbing
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Golu

    good essay, nice use of diagram

    chandlerbing
    chandlerbing
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Golu

    Also conclusion can be a lot better.

    Golu
    Golu
    8 years ago
    Reply to  chandlerbing

    Thanku

    VEER PRATAP SINGH RATHORE
    VEER PRATAP SINGH RATHORE
    8 years ago

    Topic 2 please provide marks also to get a real picture
    comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image

    lost one
    lost one
    8 years ago

    comment image
    comment image
    comment image
    comment image
    comment image
    comment image
    comment image
    comment image
    plzzz check and give marks

    lost one
    lost one
    8 years ago
    Reply to  lost one

    plzz click on thumbmnail for pics wich are not showing
    i tried to upload many times
    digital india hai bhai ….

    chandlerbing
    chandlerbing
    8 years ago
    Reply to  lost one

    Very nice description of technology. But your overall essay seemed divorced from the topic. You did not give much emphasis on science. Emphasis was only on technology.

    mike yanki
    mike yanki
    8 years ago
    Reply to  lost one

    ur essay if enriching ,full of knowledge and uses of science and tech..but the topics demands science leading to technology…a connect has to be shown every where eg.. gravity knowledge(newton explored the area,researched well,practiced and later it led to guiding satellites ,space missions..)..i think this connect has to be explored in whole essay across all dimensions ..though, few applications and challenges can also be mentioned..
    plz review mine too

    chandlerbing
    chandlerbing
    8 years ago

    The Science of Today is the Technology of Tomorrow

    Man is innately curious. He wants to know about the world he lives in. He wants to know why things happen the way they happen. He wants to know where he has come from and where is he headed. At the same time, he knows how to use his understanding to live a better life, to enhance his own well-being and to his increase his chance of survival in the world.

    The basic understanding of universe which surrounds us, its various processes and phenomena is called science. The mechanism through which this basic understanding is used to make our lives easier, on the other hand, is called technology.

    Technology always follows science. Once it is understood how a particular phenomenon works, the knowledge received is leveraged to solve any of mankind’s problems or to make any aspect of man’s life better.

    When Newton discovered laws of motion, he would not have thought that his laws would be extensively used in the impending industrial revolution. Faraday, similarly, would be surprised, if he were today, to know that the relations between electricity and magnetism he discovered so meticulously, is being put to good use in the super fast trains using maglev technology.

    Mathematics is a science which tries to understand nature in terms of numbers. Not only does it pervade all the the scientific pursuits of humans, it is used in innumerable technologies. Right from the beginning of mankind, people have been using mathematics to make their lives easier. The people of Indus valley used it in planning their towns, while the Aryans used it to define the dimensions of their sacrificial altars. It has been used in the designing of mosques, stupas, various forms of buildings in different civilizations. Maths is the force behind all the astronomical calculations which was indispensable for the sailors of yesteryear.

    Modern computing, the era of information technology and artificial intelligence has been made possible because people relentlessly tried to explain the patterns of nature, the interaction between numbers themselves and related dimensions.

    Life expectancy of people all over the world has increased from the past because man has been able to overcome a number of deadly diseases. This has been done because of extensive knowledge about the functioning of human body we have gathered over the years. A number of different methods like advanced and specialized surgery, vaccination, extraction of useful medicines from plants and animals are all geared towards helping us live more and live better.

    Mendel discovered principles of heredity and man had been using it in the past centuries for getting domesticated animals who are more productive and can stand adversities. More research in the field resulted in the knowledge of genes and the DNA. People from different parts of the world contributed to our knowledge about the structure and function of DNA.

    It is heartening as well as surprising that the knowledge has not only completely altered our understanding about the traits of different organisms but has empowered us to make organisms with useful traits. It is with the help of such advance in genetics that we witness today the development of drought and pest resistant crops or the prevention of various genetic diseases in humans.

    The development of a technology from basic science is an organic and complex process. Whatever technology that we witness, especially in the present world, is made possible because of our knowledge in a number of fields. Computers that we use, for example, rely on mathematics, the laws of electronics, semiconductors, magnetism and the like. Gene editing uses the principles of DNA, how proteins work as also mathematics and computing. Thus , a technology unifies many scientific fields.

    So much depends on science that one would think that investment in basic scientific research is the surest way to achieve technological and economic progress. It is disheartening, in this context, that India overlooks the many dimensions of scientific research. For the past decade, India’s investment in this field has only been around 0.8% of GDP while the rhetoric has always been to increase it to 2%. Moreover, scientific research is not encouraged in our country as much as becoming an engineer or a doctor. Not only this, the emphasis on science in basic education of children is also lacking. The allocation of funding to the state universities for scientific research is negligible.

    Technology and economy go hand in hand. The more technologically developed a country is, more the chances of its economic prosperity. When India dreams of becoming an economic superpower, it must then be ready to make its scientific research one of the best in the world. To achieve this, the young demography of India should be attracted towards science. Scientists should be encouraged financially and otherwise. India should have world class research facilities as well as excellent science education. Investment in science needs to be increased manifold.

    The signs are encouraging. There has been an increase in budget towards science this year. World-class neutrino observatory is coming up in Tamil Nadu which will definitely advance our position in the field of particle physics. The launch of 104 satellites by ISRO is another feather in the cap of India’s scientific achievements.

    Technology makes us efficient, our lives easier and helps us fulfill human possibilities. But for technology to work, there should be emphasis on science education and research. We still don’t know a lot about our universe. A lot of it is to be known and discovered. The more we know, the more we can use our knowledge for our own benefit . The better technologies we have, the better prosperity we can envisage for our people. The dreams of ending poverty and inequality, reducing the number of deaths, empowerment of women, energy security, mitigating climate change, infrastructure, urban development, ending terrorism, promoting peace and security are all intimately related with science. The science of today, which will become technology tomorrow will surely bring us peace and prosperity the next day.

    tanya d
    tanya d
    8 years ago

    comment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment image

    tanya d
    tanya d
    8 years ago
    Reply to  tanya d

    Please review friends…..

    Mr. Stark
    8 years ago
    Reply to  tanya d

    good presentation and structure.
    lacks coherence and becomes peripheral at moments
    please review mine…thanks

    yNa
    yNa
    8 years ago
    Reply to  tanya d

    very impressive answer
    intro needs improvement
    nice handwriting
    keep practicing

    sunny
    sunny
    8 years ago
    Reply to  tanya d

    Nice essay, you have covered both aspect and gave a holistic perspective.
    There was coherence in you essay. But like “yNa” pointed out Intro need to be catchy.

    ForumIAS
    ForumIAS
    8 years ago
    Reply to  tanya d

    Well written. Keep writing.

    mike yanki
    mike yanki
    8 years ago

    comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image

    Naina
    Naina
    8 years ago
    Reply to  mike yanki

    Hi
    Good one!
    Overall lot of dimensions with good amount of examples have been covered.:)
    Page3 content- can be used in the intro bit.
    Intro ( the first page) can be crisper
    Last page- ethical bit can be elaborated
    I felt the size of the paragraphs were not uniform some of them too short.

    mike yanki
    mike yanki
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Naina

    thnk u for ur feedback..yes ethical dimension needs elaboration..paragraphs..i ll try to manage next time..

    Naina
    Naina
    8 years ago

    comment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment image

    Naina
    Naina
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Naina

    Friends please review..

    mike yanki
    mike yanki
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Naina

    role of media well put forward..other dimensions also well painted
    -conclusion f9
    -intro can be more eye catching
    -page 1 : “developing country devoid of resources” ….correct the fact..they may or may not have resources..economic development is putting them to best utilization .
    -avoid cutting
    -dont cross the margin while writing
    -overall paras have to be more neat and well spaced..
    -page 3: “string operations”….plz correct it is sting operation..
    plz bear my criticism….keep writing…

    Naina
    Naina
    8 years ago
    Reply to  mike yanki

    Hey
    Thanks so much for the review and the suggestions. Will work on it.

    Ashish
    Ashish
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Naina

    See, your essay is good. 1) reduce cuttings to bare minimum which you can do by studying more and writing more. 2) use 2 quotes linking economy and polity 3) try to improve writing, write slow and take 15-20 mins more in beginning. Use a gel pen to improve writing.

    Naina
    Naina
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Ashish

    Thanks so much for the comments will work on it.

    Solitude
    Solitude
    8 years ago

    2. Without economic development, any potential for political openness and freedom will be questionable.

    We all have heard a famous quotation – If you want to liberate a society, first assure its basic needs of food and water. Political stability and development depends upon several factors and economic development is one of them. We all know very well about the political condition of some Central Asian countries like Syria, Yemen, Iraq, Lebnon etc. Political disturbance and war like situation has always been the main features of this region. Political rights and freedom are crushed in such a way that we can’t imagine people have ever thought of equality, liberty, dignity and peace. In opposite, we see entirely different situation in western countries. They are prosperous by all means and of course, individual rights and freedom are now basic tenants of the society. Most of the Asian countries are in transition phase and will achieve the high value liberal position in few decades.

    Why such disparity is observed region to region? The brunt of exploitation and prejudices the African faces, any other skin-colored people might have faced although the African continent is rich is natural resources. The same story is of Central Asia. Here the Islamic theology, ethnicity factor and rotten social believes are so pronounced that rights and freedom are no more alive. Here also, these regions are blessed with huge natural resources but we all know how the social and political conditions are. In Asia, Bangladesh, Bhutan, Singapore are some of the countries are are marred with natural calamity and poor resources but still people enjoy the political rights and freedom.

    Region wise such study and observations reveals the correlation between political stability and human rights and freedom. of course, there are several underlying factors that bound and strengthen such correlation, and economic development is major one of them. Destitution and misery are the major causes of ill will of an individual. Similarly, economically wrecked states are witnessed of political destabilization and social disparity. The blossom of rights and freedoms can’t be imagined on the barren land of scarcity and non-development. The theory of moral, ethics and virtues are useless to talk then.

    But, is the factor of economic development is sufficient enough to restore the full rights and freedom to individuals and to ensure the political stability and development? The answer is no. Economic development is a single factors among others although it is a prominent one. Economic development is perquisite to confer the rights and freedom in effective manner. Without economic development, the purpose of equality, freedom, rights etc would be futile. In our country, a large number of people live below poverty line and almost 75% fall under middle or below middle class group. How many of them knock the door of justice for their rights? How many of them raise their voice against poor education and health facilities? Do they use their freedom effectively for their livelihood? Very few. Our constitution has conferred us full of rights and freedom but still we frequently become the victim of exploitation and abrogation of rights. The social fabric of harmony and prosperity are guaranteed but unfortunately not pragmatically.

    The very reason lies with poor and unequal economical development. A person lying on the footpath with no food and water can’t think to go to Supreme court for his right of food and shelter. To arrange a loaf of bread for children is difficult for a poor family. The right to education is bullshit for them. Forget about these social and political rights, talk about very personal right – right to religion. Can we imagine a person with empty belly may ever think to offer Puja and recite Gita and Koran? Never. First assure them food and water and then teach them about moral and ethical values. Then, make them aware of their rights and value of freedom. A delicious food can’t be prepared without fire in spite of all the ingredients.

    Individual rights and freedoms sometimes act as a catalyst to wage the struggle against political tyranny and social disability. The path of liberation on economical and political development is better ensured with full participation of individuals and their rights. We are witnessed of freedom struggle where our leaders cherished the very virtue of liberty, rights and freedom and consequently we fought and won. Obviously, such struggle not only illuminate the preservation of our rights and freedom but also took the industrialists and policy makers on board of economic development even in post-independence era. Consciousness of rights and freedom culminated the independence struggle in other part of world also like in France, Germany, Italy and so on. In Russia, even it founded the very base of economical development through socialism ideology.

    We though concl

    navin nirala
    navin nirala
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Solitude

    Very good essay,,, but whether it wud be right to use the word bullshit..

    Solitude
    Solitude
    8 years ago
    Reply to  navin nirala

    Hehehehe…..thnks. yeah, such word should not be used in writing. I had written the essay aggressively so I did mistake. 🙁

    sachin tyagi
    sachin tyagi
    8 years ago

    Pls reviewcomment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment image

    chandlerbing
    chandlerbing
    8 years ago

    The Science of Today is the Technology of Tomorrow

    Man is innately curious. He wants to know about the world he lives in. He wants to know why things happen the way they happen. He wants to know where he has come from and where is he headed. At the same time, he knows how to use his understanding to live a better life, to enhance his own well-being and to his increase his chance of survival in the world.
    The basic understanding of universe which surrounds us, its various processes and phenomena is called science. The mechanism through which this basic understanding is used to make our lives easier, on the other hand, is called technology.
    Technology always follows science. Once it is understood how a particular phenomenon works, the knowledge received is leveraged to solve any of mankind’s problems or to make any aspect of man’s life better.
    When Newton discovered laws of motion, he would not have thought that his laws would be extensively used in the impending industrial revolution. Faraday, similarly, would be surprised, if he were today, to know that the relations between electricity and magnetism he discovered so meticulously, is being put to good use in the super fast trains using maglev technology.
    Mathematics is a science which tries to understand nature in terms of numbers. Not only does it pervade all the the scientific pursuits of humans, it is used in innumerable technologies. Right from the beginning of mankind, people have been using mathematics to make their lives easier. The people of Indus valley used it in planning their towns, while the Aryans used it to define the dimensions of their sacrificial altars. It has been used in the designing of mosques, stupas, various forms of buildings in different civilizations. Maths is the force behind all the astronomical calculations which was indispensable for the sailors of yesteryear.
    Modern computing, the era of information technology and artificial intelligence has been made possible because people relentlessly tried to explain the patterns of nature, the interaction between numbers themselves and related dimensions.
    Life expectancy of people all over the world has increased from the past because man has been able to overcome a number of deadly diseases. This has been done because of extensive knowledge about the functioning of human body we have gathered over the years. A number of different methods like advanced and specialized surgery, vaccination, extraction of useful medicines from plants and animals are all geared towards helping us live more and live better.
    Mendel discovered principles of heredity and man had been using it in the past centuries for getting domesticated animals who are more productive and can stand adversities. More research in the field resulted in the knowledge of genes and the DNA. People from different parts of the world contributed to our knowledge about the structure and function of DNA.
    It is heartening as well as surprising that the knowledge has not only completely altered our understanding about the traits of different organisms but has empowered us to make organisms with useful traits. It is with the help of such advance in genetics that we witness today the development of drought and pest resistant crops or the prevention of various genetic diseases in humans.
    The development of a technology from basic science is an organic and complex process. Whatever technology that we witness, especially in the present world, is made possible because of our knowledge in a number of fields. Computers that we use, for example, rely on mathematics, the laws of electronics, semiconductors, magnetism and the like. Gene editing uses the principles of DNA, how proteins work as also mathematics and computing. Thus , a technology unifies many scientific fields.
    So much depends on science that one would think that investment in basic scientific research is the surest way to achieve technological and economic progress. It is disheartening, in this context, that India overlooks the many dimensions of scientific research. For the past decade, India’s investment in this field has only been around 0.8% of GDP while the rhetoric has always been to increase it to 2%. Moreover, scientific research is not encouraged in our country as much as becoming an engineer or a doctor. Not only this, the emphasis on science in basic education of children is also lacking. The allocation of funding to the state universities for scientific research is negligible.
    Technology and economy go hand in hand. The more technologically developed a country is, more the chances of its economic prosperity. When India dreams of becoming an economic superpower, it must then be ready to make its scientific research one of the best in the world. To achieve this, the young demography of India should be attracted towards science. Scientists should be encouraged financially and otherwise. India should have world class research facilities as well as excellent science education. Investment in science needs to be increased manifold.
    The signs are encouraging. There has been an increase in budget towards science this year. World-class neutrino observatory is coming up in Tamil Nadu which will definitely advance our position in the field of particle physics. The launch of 104 satellites by ISRO is another feather in the cap of India’s scientific achievements.
    Technology makes us efficient, our lives easier and helps us fulfill human possibilities. But for technology to work, there should be emphasis on science education and research. We still don’t know a lot about our universe. A lot of it is to be known and discovered. The more we know, the more we can use our knowledge for our own benefit . The better technologies we have, the better prosperity we can envisage for our people. The dreams of ending poverty and inequality, reducing the number of deaths, empowerment of women, energy security, mitigating climate change, infrastructure, urban development, ending terrorism, promoting peace and security are all intimately related with science. The science of today, which will become technology tomorrow will surely bring us peace and prosperity the next day.

    Ashish
    Ashish
    8 years ago

    comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image

    Naina
    Naina
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Ashish

    Hi
    Nice essay. You have covered lot of points
    Last paragraph – I thought you could write the positive and negative of the electoral bonds together so that it doesn’t look something as entirely negative
    Write full forms..- FICCI,IMF etc
    Write short sentences
    At some places I felt the flow was lost.
    Introduction can be more synced so tut the theme is established
    Indian democracy bit and art 326 bit may come together.
    Evms can be mentioned
    May add a line about the scam you wrote in the end

    Ashish
    Ashish
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Naina

    Ya u are right about” flow” . I score average marks In mains exam. 125 last year and 133 this year. Trying to improve. Thanks for reviewing

    Naina
    Naina
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Ashish

    You are welcome. Please review mine

    Ashish
    Ashish
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Naina

    By evening I shall give feedback definitely.

    Neha Singh
    Neha Singh
    8 years ago

    Hi friends,
    this is my first ever essay for upsc cse prepration .
    kindly review it and give your valuable comments and help me to improve.
    comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image

    worldlywise
    worldlywise
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Neha Singh

    Firstly congratulations for starting essay writing.
    Review:
    -It was lengthy and painful to read.
    -Found it mere collection of ideas and facts (Need to build a story in your language and with essence of your understanding)
    -Avoid too many STRIKES (shows lack of flow and confusion)
    -you could start with small essays first.

    Manav Choudhary
    Manav Choudhary
    8 years ago
    Reply to  worldlywise

    Pls review mine also …

    Manish Singh Abhyuday
    Manish Singh Abhyuday
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Neha Singh

    Nice attempt
    too much deviating from the main theme of the essay.
    There is a lot to improve.
    keep writing.
    In this way only you will improve.

    navin nirala
    navin nirala
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Neha Singh

    Hi neha ,,, I have honestly gone through only 3 pages of ur essay. U have issues with ur grammar,, most of the times ur essay appears to be gs answer. I wud like to advice you first to go through essays written by solitude and raashi. By the way gud try,?

    worldlywise
    worldlywise
    8 years ago

    ESSAY-2

    TOTAL TIME TAKEN=60 MINS
    SHORT=FOR PAUCITY OF IDEAS AND TIME
    PLEASE REVIEWcomment image comment image comment image comment image

    PRITISH KUMAR PANDA
    PRITISH KUMAR PANDA
    8 years ago
    Reply to  worldlywise

    1 seems as if you were more focussed in describing economic power in intro itself +
    2 NEITHER HAVE YOU DESCRIBED WHAT ECONOMIC DEVELOPMENT IS .+
    3 towards the conclusion part you have talked about ED .
    SUM TOTAL = STRUCTURE IS TOTALLY MISSING

    OVERALL A GOOD ATTEMPT .
    KEEP WRITING

    worldlywise
    worldlywise
    8 years ago

    Without economic development, any potential for political openness and freedom will be questionable
    IMO
    -The topic stresses on the importance of economic dev.In simpler terms how money (though direct reference to meny seems negative) is important for political openness and freedom.
    -Relation between money and politics (positive+negative aspects)
    -How money is related to freedom.What freedom? How much it helps?

    so i restricted myself to the explaining and discussing the various role money can play in relation to political landscape and freedom in relation to various limitations for lack of liquidity.
    There was enough fodder for explaining economic development but i considered it unnecessary.
    Anyway I do understand that i should have explained eco dev in broader terms..
    Finally thanks for the review

    PRITISH KUMAR PANDA
    PRITISH KUMAR PANDA
    8 years ago
    Reply to  worldlywise

    good luck .

    Manav Choudhary
    Manav Choudhary
    8 years ago

    comment imagecomment imagecomment imagecomment image

    worldlywise
    worldlywise
    8 years ago

    POSITIVE=
    -cursory reference to relationship between ED and political openess and freedom

    NEGATIVE=
    -first page resembled the cold war and world war story
    -Too much packing of facts and data (sometimes irrelevant too)
    -You have not addressed the demand of topic

    *These are my personal views.So analyse other essays and the topic in detail and then come up with critical analysis of yourself.

    Manav Choudhary
    Manav Choudhary
    8 years ago
    Reply to  worldlywise

    Thnk you

    Panda
    Panda
    8 years ago

    comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image comment image

    pls review

    worldlywise
    worldlywise
    8 years ago
    Reply to  Panda

    POSITIVES=
    -good handwriting
    -good usage of Ambedkar and Sen’s views
    -linkage of economic underdevelopment and extremism/radicalism

    Negatives=
    -Over emphasis on political instability due to reduced ED
    -Missed substantial focus on Freedom part
    -Unsatisfactory explanation of political openness

    ultimately try was good but Diversion from core should be avoided.

    Panda
    Panda
    8 years ago
    Reply to  worldlywise

    Thnx .yes i too realized diversion after write up.
    Will try to improve next time .keep reviewing pls

    Jyoti Singh
    Jyoti Singh
    8 years ago

    vj v bcvvvb

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